Chapter 5
I didn't sleep that night.
Megan took Lily home with her.
Ellie remained at the hospital under protective supervision.
I sat in a chair beside her bed while she slept.
Every few minutes, she moved as if she were running from something in her dreams.
At 2:17 a.m., she woke screaming.
"No! Mommy!"
I was beside her immediately.
"Ellie. Ellie, you're safe."
She fought the blanket.
"Don't take her!"
"Nobody's taking anyone."
Her eyes finally focused on me.
She grabbed my arm.
"Mommy said run."
I froze.
"What?"
Then a nurse entered.
Ellie stopped talking.
Her face closed.
She curled against me until she fell asleep again.
I stayed awake.
Mommy said run.
Those three words played over and over in my head.
At seven the next morning, Detective Bell called.
"We got the DNA expedited."
My stomach clenched.
"And?"
"Ryan, Eleanor is your biological daughter."
I shut my eyes.
There had been almost no doubt left.
Still, hearing it made everything real.
I had two daughters.
One I'd tucked into bed almost every night of her life.
One had grown up believing I'd chosen not to know her.
"Thank you," I whispered.
Bell was silent for a moment.
"There's more."
I almost laughed.
There was always more.
"Hannah's vehicle was located five years ago."
"What?"
"It was found abandoned near Lake Mercer."
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"I only got full access to the original case overnight."
"Was there blood?"
"A small amount."
My hand tightened around the phone.
"Whose?"
"At the time there wasn't enough evidence to determine anything useful. Testing methods have improved."
"And now?"
"We're rerunning it."
I looked at Ellie.
"Do you think she's dead?"
Bell paused.
"I think we need evidence before reaching conclusions."
Which meant yes.
Or at least he thought it was possible.
"Claire?"
"Still not arrested."
"How?"
"Ryan."
"She hid a child in my house."
"We need to know whether she put Ellie there, whether Diane did, how long she was there, and why. Claire claims she discovered the child in the passage only three days before you did."
"That's a lie."
"Probably."
"Probably?"
"We prove things."
I hated him for being calm.
Then I remembered calm was exactly what I needed him to be.
"What does Claire say happened?"
Bell exhaled.
"She says Diane brought Ellie to your home without her knowledge."
"And the hidden room?"
"Claire claims she knew the passage existed because her mother told her about it years ago."
"Why would Diane know?"
Bell hesitated.
"The house belonged to Diane's family."
I stood so quickly the chair scraped backward.
"What?"
"Before you purchased it, the property was owned through a trust. Before that, Diane's father owned it."
"No."
"Yes."
"Claire told me she had never seen the house before our realtor showed it to us."
"She lied."
I gripped the windowsill.
The memories came back.
Claire walking through the front door during the first showing.
Her eyes moving around the foyer.
The way she'd said, I don't know, Ryan. This one feels like home.
I had thought it was romantic.
She had literally grown up there.
"Why hide that?"
"We're working on it."
I felt sick.
"How much of my life was planned?"
Bell didn't answer.
Because no detective could answer that.
Only Claire could.
At nine, a child-services representative explained that Ellie would be placed in temporary foster care unless a judge approved an emergency kinship placement.
"With me," I said.
"We'll request it."
"I'm her father."
"You are biologically her father. Legally, there are paperwork issues because you were never listed on her birth certificate."
"Because I didn't know she existed."
"I understand."
"She thinks I abandoned her. You're going to send her to strangers now?"
"We are trying not to."
I looked through the glass.
Ellie and Lily were drawing pictures.
Megan had returned early.
Lily was laughing.
Ellie wasn't.
But she was watching Lily as though she was learning how.
"Do whatever you have to do."
The representative nodded.
"I will."
At noon, I drove to the police station.
Bell had arranged for me to retrieve copies of Hannah's letters.
There were thirty-eight.
Thirty-eight attempts to tell me I had a daughter.
Some were angry.
Some desperate.
Some hopeful.
The earliest was written during Hannah's pregnancy.
Ryan,
Claire says you've changed your number.
I don't understand.
You said if anything ever happened between us, we'd at least be decent to each other.
I need to tell you something important.
Please call.
Another:
I'm six months pregnant.
She's yours.
I know you might not want this, but you deserve the truth.
Another:
Claire came to my apartment again.
She says you're marrying her.
I don't care who you're with.
I only want you to know your daughter.
Tell her to stop coming here.
My hands started shaking.
Claire had visited her.
Repeatedly.
Another:
She offered me money today.
Twenty thousand dollars to leave the state.
She said you wanted it this way.
I don't believe her.
Another:
I named her Eleanor because your grandmother's name was Eleanor.
I hope that's okay.
She smiled today.
I wish you'd seen it.
I had to stop reading.
My grandmother had died when I was fourteen.
Only a handful of people knew how much she'd meant to me.
Hannah had remembered.
The final letter was dated eight days before she disappeared.
Ryan,
I'm taking Ellie and leaving Diane's house tonight.
I made a mistake trusting her.
Claire and Diane are working together.
I don't know why.
Diane keeps saying I'm unstable.
They're threatening to prove I'm an unfit mother.
Claire says if I contact you, she'll make sure I lose Ellie.
I recorded everything.
If you're reading this, find the blue box.
Don't trust Claire.
I looked at Bell.
"What blue box?"
"We don't know."
"Did you search Diane's storage unit?"
"Twice."
"Her house?"
"We're obtaining a warrant for the old farmhouse."
"She still owns it?"
"Through another company."
I laughed bitterly.
"Of course she does."
Bell leaned forward.
"Ryan, I need to ask you something uncomfortable."
"Go ahead."
"Before Hannah, during Hannah, or immediately after Hannah—did you have any relationship with Claire?"
"No."
"Sexual?"
"No."
"Emotional?"
"No."
"Did she pursue you?"
I thought.
At first, nothing.
Then a memory surfaced.
A charity fundraiser.
Claire had been there.
Hannah and I attended together.
Claire spilled wine on me.
We laughed.
She brought me towels.
She knew my name.
I had assumed Hannah introduced us earlier.
Maybe she hadn't.
"There were moments," I said slowly.
"What kind?"
"I think she was around more than I realized."
Bell nodded.
"Claire's former roommate gave us a statement this morning."
My skin prickled.
"What did she say?"
"Claire had been interested in you for almost two years before you started dating."
"What?"
"She kept photographs."
"Of me?"
"Yes."
I stared at him.
"That's insane."
"She apparently attended places she knew you'd be."
"No."
"Ryan—"
"No. She told me we met at a coffee shop by coincidence."
Bell didn't say anything.
My entire marriage rearranged itself in my mind.
The coffee shop.
The fundraiser.
The gym she suddenly joined.
The neighborhood she'd recommended.
The house.
Nothing was random.
"Why me?"
"That's one of the questions we're trying to answer."
My phone rang.
Megan.
I answered immediately.
"Hey."
Her voice was shaking.
"Ryan, where are you?"
"Police station."
"Come back to the hospital."
"What happened?"
"It's Ellie."
My heart stopped.
"Is she hurt?"
"No. She said something."
"What?"
Megan lowered her voice.
"She heard you and Detective Bell talking earlier about Hannah."
"Okay."
"She started crying. I asked what was wrong."
"Megan."
"Ryan, Ellie says her mother isn't dead."
I couldn't breathe.
"What?"
"She says Hannah is alive."
I stood.
"Where?"
"That's the thing."
May you like
Megan began crying.
"Ellie says she knows exactly where Claire keeps her."
