Chapter 4
Sarah was waiting in the driveway when we got home.
She ran toward the truck before I had even turned off the engine.
I stepped out and shut the door behind me.
“Where was he?”
“Safe.”
“I have been losing my mind.”
“So has he.”
She tried to look past me.
“Ethan?”
I moved in front of her.
“Give him space.”
Her face tightened.
“I want to apologize.”
“Not tonight.”
“You don’t get to decide whether I can speak to him.”
“Tonight I do.”
Ethan quietly got out of the passenger side.
Sarah immediately softened her voice.
“Ethan.”
He stopped.
She took one step toward him.
“I am so sorry.”
He stared at the ground.
“I never wanted you to hear any of that.”
Something about those words made me angry all over again.
Not I never should have said it.
I never wanted you to hear it.
Ethan looked up.
“So you did say it.”
Sarah froze.
I closed my eyes.
Even now, she couldn’t stop making things worse.
Ethan walked past her.
Mom met him at the door and wrapped an arm around his shoulders.
Lily came running from inside.
“Ethan!”
She hugged him around the waist.
He hugged her back.
Sarah watched from ten feet away.
For the first time, she looked like the outsider.
She turned to me.
“I made mistakes.”
“You made plans.”
“That text doesn’t mean what you think.”
I had not told her about the screenshot.
Her words confirmed she knew exactly what I had seen.
“So you know Jessica sent it.”
Sarah cursed under her breath.
“She’s trying to destroy us.”
“No. You sent the message.”
“I was angry.”
“When?”
“What?”
“When were you angry? When you contacted her? When you offered her money? When you asked my mother to take Ethan? When you told Lily he wasn’t her real brother? Which angry moment are we talking about?”
Tears ran down her face.
“You have no idea what the last few years have been like for me.”
“Then tell me.”
“You and Ethan have this world that existed before me.”
I stared at her.
She wiped her cheeks.
“When I met you, you two had routines. Jokes. Traditions. Every room had some story from before I arrived.”
“That’s normal.”
“For you.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means I always felt like I was entering someone else’s family.”
“You married a father.”
“I know.”
“Then what did you expect?”
“I expected us to build something together.”
“We did.”
“Did we?”
She pointed toward the house.
“When Lily was born, I thought things would change.”
My stomach tightened.
“Change how?”
“I thought we would finally have something that was ours.”
“We had a daughter.”
“But everything still revolved around Ethan.”
“He was six years old.”
“He had soccer four nights a week.”
“Two nights.”
“Everything was his schedule.”
“He was a child.”
“So was Lily.”
“And I was her father every single day.”
Sarah shook her head.
“You don’t understand.”
“No. I don’t.”
My voice broke.
“I don’t understand how you could hold a baby in your arms and decide her brother was competition.”
Sarah stared at me.
“I didn’t decide that.”
“You treated him like it.”
“I loved Ethan.”
“Past tense?”
She flinched.
I regretted the question for exactly one second.
Then I remembered my son asking how much money he was worth.
Sarah leaned against the car.
“I still care about him.”
“That is not enough.”
“What do you want me to say?”
“I want the truth.”
“You couldn’t handle the truth.”
“Try me.”
She looked toward the house.
Then back at me.
“I wanted one part of my life where I didn’t have to share you with something from before.”
My chest tightened.
“He is not something from before.”
“I know.”
“He is my son.”
“I know!”
“Then stop talking like he’s an old couch I brought into the marriage.”
Sarah covered her face.
For several seconds, she cried.
I didn’t comfort her.
That realization hurt.
For twelve years, my first instinct had always been to comfort my wife.
Now I just stood there.
Finally she lowered her hands.
“I need help.”
“Yes.”
She looked surprised.
“I need therapy.”
“Yes.”
“I need to fix this.”
“Yes.”
Her eyes searched mine.
“Do you still love me?”
That question would have been easy twenty-four hours earlier.
Now I didn’t know.
“I love who I thought you were.”
Sarah’s face crumpled.
I hated saying it.
I hated that it was true.
She whispered, “Are you asking me to leave?”
I looked at the house.
My children were inside.
My mother was inside.
Every instinct in my body told me Ethan needed to wake up tomorrow without wondering whether Sarah still wanted him gone.
“Yes.”
Sarah stared at me.
“For how long?”
“I don’t know.”
“This is my home.”
“I know.”
“You can’t just throw me out.”
“I’m not throwing you out. I’m asking you to stay somewhere else tonight.”
“And Lily?”
“Stays here.”
“No.”
I looked at her.
“Sarah.”
“No. If I leave, my daughter comes with me.”
I felt something shift.
Not anger.
Alarm.
“You’re not taking Lily in the middle of this.”
“She’s my child.”
“She’s ours.”
“You think I’m dangerous now?”
“I think she just watched her mother tell her brother he wasn’t family.”
“You are not keeping my daughter from me.”
“I didn’t say that.”
Sarah pulled out her phone.
“What are you doing?”
“Calling my mother.”
“Fine.”
“I’m taking Lily there.”
“No.”
Her eyes narrowed.
“You do not get to order me around.”
“And you don’t get to use Lily as leverage because I asked you to leave.”
We stood in the driveway staring at each other.
Then the front door opened.
Lily stood there in her party dress.
Mom was behind her.
“Mommy?”
Sarah’s face changed immediately.
“Baby.”
Lily came down the walkway slowly.
“Are you leaving?”
Sarah knelt.
“Just for tonight.”
Lily’s eyes filled.
“Because of Ethan?”
“No.”
I watched Sarah.
She hesitated.
Then did one thing right.
“Because Mommy made some bad choices.”
Lily looked at me.
“Is Ethan leaving too?”
“No,” I said.
She turned back to Sarah.
“Then I want to stay.”
Sarah’s expression broke.
“You don’t want to come with me?”
Lily shook her head.
“I want Ethan.”
Sarah closed her eyes.
For a moment, I thought she might argue.
Instead, she hugged Lily.
A long hug.
When she stood, she looked at me.
“I’ll stay at Megan’s.”
I nodded.
“I’ll bring you clothes.”
“No. I’ll pack.”
We went inside separately.
Sarah walked upstairs.
I stayed with the children.
Mom sat beside me.
“What are you going to do?”
“I don’t know.”
She touched my arm.
“Yes, you do.”
I looked at her.
“You’re just scared to say it.”
Before I could answer, Sarah came downstairs with a suitcase.
She kissed Lily.
She looked at Ethan.
He stared back at her.
“I’m sorry,” she said.
Ethan didn’t answer.
Sarah walked out.
Ten minutes later, her car disappeared down the street.
That night, neither child wanted to sleep alone.
So we made blankets on the living room floor.
Lily fell asleep holding Ethan’s hand.
Mom took the couch.
I sat in the armchair watching them.
At 1:14 in the morning, my phone buzzed.
A message from Megan.
Sarah’s sister.
Are the kids asleep?
Yes.
Can I call you?
I stepped into the kitchen.
My phone rang immediately.
“Megan?”
She was whispering.
“I need to tell you something.”
My stomach tightened.
“What?”
“I’m at my house. Sarah is in the guest room.”
“Okay.”
“She’s asleep.”
“What is this about?”
Megan exhaled.
“She left her iPad downstairs.”
I said nothing.
“It’s connected to her messages.”
My heart started pounding.
“Megan.”
“I know I shouldn’t have looked.”
“What did you find?”
Silence.
Then she said four words.
“There’s more than Jessica.”
I gripped the counter.
“How much more?”
Megan’s voice trembled.
“She’s been talking to a lawyer for six months.”
Everything in me went cold.
“About what?”
“Custody.”
I couldn’t speak.
Megan continued.
“She wanted to know what would happen if you divorced.”
“That doesn’t mean—”
“She asked how to make sure Ethan couldn’t live in the same house as Lily.”
I closed my eyes.
May you like
Then Megan said something worse.
“She was building a case against your son.”
